Moving Forward

10 Comments

It’s been a little over two weeks since my awful raid experience. I haven’t logged on since, and I haven’t healed. The day after the raid, the raid leader talked to me and interestingly the biggest thing on his mind from the previous morning was my healing numbers. I knew that this was not the place for me and I bowed out of the raid team.

 

There were a couple things (some that happened before the talk and some that happened after) that really confirmed that I had made the right decision. One of the officers had made a post titled my character’s name and proceeded to critique all my gems, enchants etc. with no reference to any credible priest resource. Shortly after my conversation with the raid leader, I saw a recruitment post go up for my spot with a special note that they would not tolerate “weak-minded” people. Yep, I was done.

The last two weeks have had me trying my best to figure out what it all means for my WoW future. Somehow, they really did get to me and made me question my own ability to heal. For the longest while, the thought of raid frames and healing just made me feel sick.

This might’ve been the end of it if not for the advice and support of all the folks who commented on the blog and talked to me. I just want to say a big “Thank you” to you all. Two weeks ago, I truly did believe that I would just be walking away from it all, a failed healer and whatnot. And I’m truly thankful to everyone who took the time to tell me it was them and not me. I wanted to believe it then, but it took me all this while to be able to.

I still enjoy playing WoW and blogging, and if the chapter ever comes to an end, I want it to be my decision alone and not be intimidating into quitting. I’ve been slowly dipping my toes back into WoW with some alt-levelling on an RAF account – something I’ve never really done before but boy, is triple experience fun! πŸ™‚ I still haven’t yet logged into my priest but now it’s more a matter of when, rather than if. And I’m slowly working on getting all those unpublished Healing Perspectives posts out as well.

To the wonderful blogging community, commenters, and friends: Thank you, again.

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10 thoughts on “Moving Forward

  1. I am glad that even though we are merely voices on the interwebz, that our thoughts were enough to buoy you on your way. Glad you’re having fun levelling! (though the thought of levelling makes me shudder, I am glad you’re enjoying it). I look forward to reading your other healing perspectives posts, like always.

  2. Glad to see you’ve had a change of heart and have got a different outlook on WoW along with not letting those losers beat you…and from what you described that’s exactly what they are.

    I’m an ex-raider…still do LFR but that’s not raiding imo…who stepped away from it after growing tired of all the stuff that made it seem like a job instead of the game that WoW is supposed to be.

    Since leaving raiding I’ve returned to the game I enjoyed in Classic which offers so much more. There is a lot of stuff to do that doesn’t involve raiding especially in MoP.

    • You’re right – there is SO much to do outside of raiding. (Much of which I’ve sadly neglected in favour of the things that go along with being raid ready). I have barely scratched the surface of Pet Battles and can’t wait to try them out!

  3. “I saw a recruitment post go up for my spot with a special note that they would not tolerate ‘weak-minded’ people. Yep, I was done.”

    I love it when they do that sort of passive-aggressive jab, don’t you? After my last attempt at “learning how to raid” went to eff with much social drama included, I saw a recruiting post for my spot, saying that due to a “past mistake,” they would be trialing people. OH GOOD.

    I didn’t give up on the game, but I have given up on ever raiding. Occasionally my new guild will drag me through a gearing run because they look at my heroic gun and wince, but I know that I am not and never will be a “real raider.” Every time I’ve tried, it’s been a terribly miserable experience, even with guildmembers I thought to be my friends.

    If you ever want to hang out and derp around, let me know. I can give ye my battletag thingus. I mostly play Horde, but I do have a couple of Alliance that should probably get dusted off every now and then. πŸ˜€ I typically do old-school runs for transmog, the usual derp patrol (something like, “A WARBRINGER! HURRY GUYS, BEFORE I SOLO THIS!” followed by instant death), LFR etc. I also like to scream about snails, Feign Death before it’s clear a wipe will occur and window shop on the AH.

    I am also going to link you! Hurray for transmog!

    • How did I not know about your blog until now?! I love it πŸ™‚ I was reading a couple posts and the pictures just had me laughing the entire time. Especially Durumu’s maze… πŸ˜€

      And yep, the not-so-subtle passive aggressive thing that they do is just well – ugh. Strangely, I saw them do it yet again when I was randomly browsing the guild recruitment forums. Somebody else left their raid group apparently, and their recruitment post had a special note of “if you get butt-hurt easily do not apply” or something like that. Gets less subtle all the time I guess.

      I’m STILL not sure what my raiding future holds. I really miss healing but every time I think of looking for a guild or trying out a raid team, I just get a panic attack >.< For now, I'm spending more time on work and such and its actually fun so I'm just going with the flow.

      I'll look you up – hanging out and derping around sounds great. My main 90 is alliance (go gnomes!) but thanks to the RAF I've been levelling some horde alts.:)

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